[Lighter's knee-jerk reaction was to react poorly. To insist he was fine, but force his tone to stay neutral. But it wasn't like Maxima was forcing the matter. He could be that way, he could take an authoritative tone. But he wasn't, and it would be a real dick move to pull that after a guy had a dream that intense.
There wasn't a mean bone in this guy's body.
So after being silent for a while... Lighter spoke. He... he was not ready at all to share the whole story.
He'd share, but only a little.]
I spent a lot of time underground. In less than legal rings where people would place bets on the fighters. No rules of your typical boxing match down there, only enough to still make it a show.
[A humorless huff of a laugh.]
You don't get a lot of natural light in places like that, you know? Guess I'm still not used to how Meropide is.
[Maxima listens, expression dark and tight as he imagines what Lighter's describing to him. Fighting for show, for bets, for money, with no one caring too much about the state of the people in the ring so long as they can continue making more money...how many of those scars would have healed better if he'd been allowed to recover properly? The thought makes him feel a little ill.]
...I had no idea. [Although he had wondered, just a little bit, why someone of Lighter's skills took such care to avoid Meropide's boxing ring. The reason is only too obvious now.]
It must be difficult for you, down here. [He swallows slightly before asking the next question, as if reluctant. He doesn't really want to encourage Lighter to leave, doesn't like the idea of being farther away and seeing him less often, but...] ...Can I ask, haven't you considered moving to somewhere less...traumatic?
[Admittedly even that he was nervous to share. Or maybe he's just spent too much time around God Fearing Abuelitas in his life to expect a quiet reaction to his time underground.
He still enjoyed a spar, but he's not even so much as looked at the Pankration Arena. Even thinking about it made the memories creep in.
At that question though his brow furrowed. Well, while he was being half-way honest.]
I won't lie and say it hasn't crossed my mind. But it's a nice place down here, there's good people and good food. And you can't really beat not having to think about rent or utilities.
[It let him put a more tangible dent in all the money he still owed. But that... Lighter didn't think he'd share this echo of his past life with anyone except Belle...]
Besides, it's not like bad dreams like that come up all the time. The good outweighs the bad, you know?
[Just two to three times a month in the privacy of his own space.]
[He hates that he's relieved to hear that Lighter means to stay. His friend's well-being should be more important to him than his own comfort. But in the end, Lighter's chosen to be here, and maybe it's just not his place to question that choice.]
That does make sense. ...And I am glad that we get to enjoy your company, too. So long as it isn't at the expense of your health.
[It isn't about anything else except that...having Lighter around makes him feel like someone understands him. He's lived apart from others too, been seen as less than for things he can't help, concealed his kindness behind a careful mask so as not to be taken advantage of.
But he's starting to feel the distance between them. There are things he doesn't know and can't fix. Maybe one day he can find a way to make Lighter feel understood, too.]
[It's not a crime to be a little selfish. That's what Lighter would tell him if he knew the thoughts in Maxima's head. Hypocritical, maybe, given that he was so selfless as to take on that seven digit debt.]
Don't worry, I'll be alright. If I really wanted to leave I would have already done it. And even if I did, I've got people I'd pay a visit just about every day.
[Enough that you'd think he lived there anyway, sort of like that one angry cook in the kitchen whose name escaped him. Lighter liked the people here. More than any family he was part of.
Except maybe one... but he didn't know if he could call that "Lighter"'s family his own anymore. Not when he didn't remember them.]
Sorry about all that, I didn't mean to wake you up. What time is it even...
[The reminder of the hour also reminds Maxima that he's still a little fuzzy with the sudden awakening. He yawns widely.]
Whatever the time is, it's certainly not morning yet. We should both try to get a little more rest.
[He settles himself down a little more under the blankets, offering the other man his space back and watching Lighter with a look that's a little bit more pleading than he realizes, a little bit more than he would consciously offer if he was entirely himself, if he hadn't been abruptly woken in the small hours of the morning to intimately-held emotions.]
[Lighter took the pleading look to be a trick from his sensitive eyes. From both the brightness and the lack of sleep. Either way, he heeded that supposed trick and shuffled back into the offered space. He didn't realize how quickly he wrapped an arm around Maxima's torso after getting comfortable.
If he grounded himself with more touch, maybe he wouldn't need to continue that nightmare.]
[Maxima is more than willing to accommodate the contact as he gets comfortable. He taps the lights back off and then wraps himself around Lighter as much as he possibly can, as if he can use his body to shield the man from any more bad dreams.]
Rest well, Lorenzo. [The words are murmured against his hair, a wish cast into the darkness as they breathe against one another.]
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no subject
[Lighter's knee-jerk reaction was to react poorly. To insist he was fine, but force his tone to stay neutral. But it wasn't like Maxima was forcing the matter. He could be that way, he could take an authoritative tone. But he wasn't, and it would be a real dick move to pull that after a guy had a dream that intense.
There wasn't a mean bone in this guy's body.
So after being silent for a while... Lighter spoke. He... he was not ready at all to share the whole story.
He'd share, but only a little.]
I spent a lot of time underground. In less than legal rings where people would place bets on the fighters. No rules of your typical boxing match down there, only enough to still make it a show.
[A humorless huff of a laugh.]
You don't get a lot of natural light in places like that, you know? Guess I'm still not used to how Meropide is.
no subject
...I had no idea. [Although he had wondered, just a little bit, why someone of Lighter's skills took such care to avoid Meropide's boxing ring. The reason is only too obvious now.]
It must be difficult for you, down here. [He swallows slightly before asking the next question, as if reluctant. He doesn't really want to encourage Lighter to leave, doesn't like the idea of being farther away and seeing him less often, but...] ...Can I ask, haven't you considered moving to somewhere less...traumatic?
no subject
He still enjoyed a spar, but he's not even so much as looked at the Pankration Arena. Even thinking about it made the memories creep in.
At that question though his brow furrowed. Well, while he was being half-way honest.]
I won't lie and say it hasn't crossed my mind. But it's a nice place down here, there's good people and good food. And you can't really beat not having to think about rent or utilities.
[It let him put a more tangible dent in all the money he still owed. But that... Lighter didn't think he'd share this echo of his past life with anyone except Belle...]
Besides, it's not like bad dreams like that come up all the time. The good outweighs the bad, you know?
[Just two to three times a month in the privacy of his own space.]
no subject
That does make sense. ...And I am glad that we get to enjoy your company, too. So long as it isn't at the expense of your health.
[It isn't about anything else except that...having Lighter around makes him feel like someone understands him. He's lived apart from others too, been seen as less than for things he can't help, concealed his kindness behind a careful mask so as not to be taken advantage of.
But he's starting to feel the distance between them. There are things he doesn't know and can't fix. Maybe one day he can find a way to make Lighter feel understood, too.]
no subject
Don't worry, I'll be alright. If I really wanted to leave I would have already done it. And even if I did, I've got people I'd pay a visit just about every day.
[Enough that you'd think he lived there anyway, sort of like that one angry cook in the kitchen whose name escaped him. Lighter liked the people here. More than any family he was part of.
Except maybe one... but he didn't know if he could call that "Lighter"'s family his own anymore. Not when he didn't remember them.]
Sorry about all that, I didn't mean to wake you up. What time is it even...
no subject
Whatever the time is, it's certainly not morning yet. We should both try to get a little more rest.
[He settles himself down a little more under the blankets, offering the other man his space back and watching Lighter with a look that's a little bit more pleading than he realizes, a little bit more than he would consciously offer if he was entirely himself, if he hadn't been abruptly woken in the small hours of the morning to intimately-held emotions.]
no subject
[Lighter took the pleading look to be a trick from his sensitive eyes. From both the brightness and the lack of sleep. Either way, he heeded that supposed trick and shuffled back into the offered space. He didn't realize how quickly he wrapped an arm around Maxima's torso after getting comfortable.
If he grounded himself with more touch, maybe he wouldn't need to continue that nightmare.]
Night...
no subject
Rest well, Lorenzo. [The words are murmured against his hair, a wish cast into the darkness as they breathe against one another.]